Sunday | January 12, 2003
Well the Graham Cracker appears to have officially unofficially thrown his good-'ol-boy self into the race for the Democratic nomination, by uttering the magical phrase "fire in my belly" at a news conference down in Florida.
Please excuse my personal prejudices, but I personally would like to see someone other than a pasty-faced Southern white boy get the nomination.
I mean, just for a change of pace, can't the Dems serve us up a pasty-faced Northern white boy? Or a pasty faced Midwestern white boy? I mean look at Gephardt: He's definitely pasty faced. What's wrong with him?
Or heck, what about a pasty-faced Western white boy? (Preferably one who doesn't have governor of California on his resume.) Last time I checked, the states west of the Mississippi were still in the Union. They've got pasty-faced white boys out there, too, you know.
As usual, I've got forked tongue firmly in cheek here. But seriously: Sooner or later, the Dems are going to have to figure out a way to win without the South, and they might as well get started in 2004, since it's probably going to end up being a practice run, anyway.
I will amend that slightly, by changing "win without the South" to read, "win without the South except Florida." Hard to do the electoral math without Florida. Which, I suppose, does put Graham a couple of cuts above all the other pasty faced Southern white boys out there.
But (reinserts tongue in cheek.) it's like being forced to eat okra: sure, it's full of iron; maybe it is good for you. But it's also slimy and gross and tastes like ka-ka. Do we really have to eat it? What's wrong with iron supplements?
Likewise, do the Dems really have to nominate Graham? Couldn't they just send John Kerry to "Southern School," teach him how to speak NASCAR, chew tobacco, stuff like that?
OK, now that I've gotten that off my chest, some of our esteemed commentators can explain -- hopefully without using too much profanity -- why I am completely out to lunch.Posted January 12, 2003 12:12 PM | Comments (101)